Thursday, 14 April 2011


It was one of those days. I came home from work, tired as hell, changed into my unforgivable Uggs and Juicy ensemble reserved only for those moments when the thought of closing a zip or doing up a row of buttons is akin to swimming the English Channel and headed to my local partridges to buy a microwave dinner. At this point I would like to note that this is not usually my life, but once in a blue moon, it can be.

So there I am, birds nest on my head because it rained on the way to the shop and I didn't use my frizz-ease that morning,  smudged eyeliner (unbeknown to me until way later) and a complexion that hasn't seen the sun in months.

So anyway. Here I am. A mess- not a hot one. And as I am paying my usual shop assistant, he squints at me in concentration. Vanity can be a terrible thing and not wanting to betray my identity I tilt my head, eyes looking to the side, studiously inspecting the mars bars (sounds weird, but we've all pretended to be absorbed by something incredibly stupid when we haven't wanted people to notice us)

On my way from work today at about 10.30pm I ducked into Partridges because I fancied some jelly beans. As I was browsing the same shop assistant looked at me and this time I beamed with vigour.

"Hello!! I haven't seen you in ages, how are you, are you working?"

me-    "Helllllo!! I am great thanks. how are you? I like what you've done to the place"

"Yes, we had new refrigerators fitted. looks nice, doesn't it"

me-   "definitely, its like a whole new shop"

"i though I saw you the other day but I wasn't sure"- he says thinking hard

me-   "you might have, but it may have been my sister, she looks kinda like me"

"ah probably"

Terrible I know. But it was one of those desperately apologetic moments where I felt I had to justify my laziness, tiredness, uncommunicativeness on that day and the painful hours I work, both to him and to myself. A deep existential hole opened up before me and I jumped, right over it.

"She's was only staying with me for a bit though"- I said shrugging my shoulders and walking towards the till


Submitted by xpsycho

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